Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize