i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Randomize
