ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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