this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
