yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize
