We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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