He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Quick, to the slutcave!
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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