How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
