at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize