How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
worst night to have a conscience
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
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