pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
