i barfeds in our rink
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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