i barfeds in our rink
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Are we still banned from the library?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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