Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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