I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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