just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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