im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
