GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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