I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
