Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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