Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
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