I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
