did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
