how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
