In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I CAN MOONWALK!
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
