Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
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Green mimosas i think yes
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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