rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ttyl tear gas
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
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