Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize