Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
well, you know. whores of a feather.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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