would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
