Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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