They should really pass out barf bags in church
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
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