Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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