I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Randomize
