I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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