those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait