Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
