I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
