Yo dont text me then not text me
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
