omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
no. you can't hotbox the world.
This house was built for laser tag.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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