He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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