I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
