TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
