I need help removing her.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
