I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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