I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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