their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Randomize
