I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize