are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
We need to rekindle our bromance
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Randomize
