I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
