i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
