I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
only if we run a train.
done.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
